Excitement!

After finishing Thirteen Reasons Why, I discover Jay Asher has written another book: The Future Of Us. Having seen this book in my store several times, I've always ignored it and never thought to take a second look. The cover is blue with a red outline of a heart, and that's all I've noticed. After re-finding out about this book, if that makes sense, I went online to do some research. The red heart is actually made of a cable wire, with frayed wires on one end, and a phone jack connection on the other. Right off the bat, this got me interested way more then I ever had been, I assumed the book was some lame love story, like most teen books are, and that's not my cup of tea. Upon further inspection, I learn The Future Of Us is about two young teens, best friends and neighbours in 1996, whom install the latest version of AOL on their computers... only to discover facebook pop-up, which hasn't been invented yet. A bit confused, it seems the facebook they discover, is their own from the future. There is an excerpt for this book in the back of Thirteen Reasons Why, that I of course, had to read. How cool would that be to go into the future, through facebook, and see what you're life will be like. I have had several talks in the past with close friends, about how facebook is setting new precedence for the way we may story tell in the future. I always imagine being in my 40s, with my kids old enough to use the computer, and have their own facebook account, if it's still around. I imagine them sitting on the computer, going through MY facebook profile, looking back at photos of me from my early 20s on, watching me grow up on the internet. They'll be able to see what was going on in my life, generally, at any given point in time. Depending on status updates, or links I shared, they'll be able to see what was relevant in my life, hot trends and topics. Now I'm not saying this is the way it will go, already the pictures uploaded of me have drastically slowed, and I rarely post anything anymore unless it's a funny picture. So that may not happen, but it's neat to think about. And although this book isn't exactly that, it's cool to think about how much you can learn from anyone, especially yourself, from facebook.

So, ya, I'm excited to read this one. I hope to post a book journal on it as well, and I hope it's as good as his last.

Book Journal #1 - 13 Reasons Why

Thirteen Reasons Why by Jay Asher

"Clay Jensen returns home from school to find a strange package with his name on it lying on his porch. Inside he discovers several cassette tapes recorded by Hannah Baker - his classmate and crush - who committed suicide two weeks earlier. Hannah's voice tells him that there are thirteen reasons why she decided to end her life. Clay is one of them. If he listens, he'll find out why. Clay spends the night crisscrossing his town with Hannah as his guide. He becomes a firsthand witness to Hannah's pain, and learns the truth about himself - a truth he never wanted to face."

From the first page, I'm captivated. Clay brings a package to a post office to send to the next person on Hannah's list. I need to know what the package contains. What does he know?

Nearly one third of the way through the book, I can't put it down. I went to work this morning excited to get home and keep reading. Most teen books have wide spacing, margins and typeface, and this book is no exception. With that being said, I still can't believe how quickly I'm turning pages. Usually I have a hard time reading in any room with noise unless it's very quiet. Last night I sat reading with Sean watching the TV at a normal volume and I had no problem tuning it out. I generally don't read teen novels, but this I had heard was good. My manager has also decided she wants all staff to pick a couple teen novels for our staff picks, to help sales in our teen section - which I thought were doing well. So I went with this one. And I'm glad I did.

Hannah's story has gotten dark and somewhat twisted, at times, creepy. I generally do not read quickly, I can count on one hand how many books I've devoured, and this one will be added to that hand. It's not even so much the subject matter, but the author has a great way of telling stories from multiple character view points, both genders. The story is so intriguing. Hannah's story on the tapes is so well told, she really sucks you in and makes you stay. I feel connected to her, and Clay while listening to her story, wondering how this is going to tie together, and filling in the blanks for the reader along the way. I can not get enough of this book so far.

Just over half way through the book, still a page turner. The story is getting more in-depth and interesting, as it should. At first, I found it confusing to be constantly tossed back and forth between Hannah and Clay, but it's amazing how quickly I got used to that. The author does an excellent job. We are only about half way through Hannah's story and the pieces are slowly starting to come together, although there are still a lot of unanswered questions. At times I feel really bad for these characters she talks about in her tapes, but ultimately in the end, you can definitely see her anger towards them, even if it does seem like petty teenage problems. While I usually try not to analyze the loss of a life too much, Hannah's story is a complex one, one which you have no choice but to really think about while reading this book. "But school hadn't been a safe haven of mine for a long time. And after your photo escapades, Tyler, my home was no longer secure. Now, suddenly, even my own thoughts were being offered up for ridicule." Many of Hannah's problems may seem like small, petty things, and I suppose on their own they would be. Things that most teenagers may laugh off and get over in a few days. But to Hannah, it seems as though she feels she's being attacked, from every angle. She can't escape anything from anyone, she doesn't even want to think to herself anymore, and it feels her whole life is on display for everyone to watch crumble. Although, they don't understand it's crumbling. Or maybe they don't care.

About 60 pages left to go and it feels as though I have hit the climax of the book. I've just discovered Clays part in the story and I feel... relieved. I image that's how he feels too, a long with a mix of other emotions. The author does a good job of really making you feel for Clay, and after finding out his role in Hannah's list of suicide reasons, you feel grateful that his part isn't horrible. But at the same time, it's almost as though it was predictable for the author to not make you hate our main character. It seems too cliche that he remains the good guy. But, on the other hand, what if he did something awful and my whole view of him changed? I'm not sure which idea I like better, but I'm happy with how it turned out. I feel so sad though, you can feel Hannah giving up on herself, on the people around her.

FINISHED! Great book. Would highly recommend to anyone and everyone. Very captivating, definitely a page turner. Suspenseful and mysterious. You grow with Clay's character over one night while his life changes. You grow with Hannah's story and watch as she becomes at peace with her decision. This is definitely a book that is going to stay with me for a very long time.


When I first began the book, Sean had mentioned he hoped the book didn't make suicide look appealing. Those were not his exact words, but his point was that it might influence young people to take their life, like this book was glamorizing suicide. At the time, I didn't know if I should agree or disagree. I would certainly hope and imagine that the author in no way intended for suicide to look like a good idea. But I could see what Sean meant by what he said. Now, I think the authors intent was to show that everyone has issues to deal with. And I don't mean for that too sound like a brush off. It reminds me of the quote, to walk a mile in someones shoes, or to always be kind, for everyone is fighting a hard battle. I've read reviews of people saying this book changed their life, and I've read that people say since reading it they try to treat other people with more kindness and understanding. I not only think, but am very certain that the point of this book is to make people aware. In the book during a peer interaction class, the teacher states that suicide often goes unpublished in the news, unless it happens in front of others. You hear about teen suicide in the media now, especially in the days since Amanda Todd, who wasn't the first or last. Amanda had made a video on YouTube confessing her trauma to the world, she then took her own life. Regardless of your views on the matter, I can't help but feel as if it wouldn't have mattered had she not made that video. Like Hannah, if she was just another girl at another school in another city, and didn't make that cry for help, would we have ever heard about it? Suicide is something the media tries to steer away from, if it's just some random person no one knows of. But Amanda Todd? Her story went differently. A year or so ago, a friend told me about a guy who lived in his building, who had jumped off his balcony, on the 12th or 13th floor, front of the building, landing in front of the main doors around 7am one morning, in the middle of the week. Obviously an ambulance came, and cops, the building managers shut down that entrance and re-directed everyone to the side exit of the building to leave for work. I never did ask my friend about that after, but I can assume the building managers certainly did not post anything about it in their main office or lobby. I tried to search online for anything about it, I looked deep into the local newspaper. I could never find anything, who it was, why or anything, and I never will.

Suicide is just one of those topics people don't want to talk about. To report on it the news without that person already making - and I use this world in the most innocent of ways - a production out of it, is for some reason taboo. I think that's what Mr. Asher is trying to get across in this story. It's not to glorify suicide or make light of a situation, it's to hit home how serious it is, regardless of any reason what-so-ever, it's something that should never be taken lightly. We all need to be careful of how we treat others around us. Even the simplest most innocent things can dramatically affect someones life.

The World of Tattoos

Tattoos.

I have several tattoos, including a full sleeve on my left arm. My tattoo artist is a close friend whom I went to college with. Most of my friends have tattoos. My boyfriend also has a full left sleeve (we both had them when we met - they drew us together), he also has a gigantic rib piece on his right side, and a new one started on the left side of his back. My brother has a full right sleeve, a giant rib piece on his right, and a chest piece. Our parents... accept them. Our father just shakes his head and asks why. Our mom definitely seems more into them. My brother also has huge stretched ears. When we go out in public with our mom she calls us her "freak children" and seems to get a kick out of it. She's really down to earth about them. My self adopted brother (my real brothers best friend) has a full right sleeve, a chest piece and probably several others. My point is I love tattoos. The people I love, love tattoos. My friends and family alike all support my love of tattoos. My co-workers enjoy my tattoos. My boss has said she will never ask me to cover my tattoos, unless someone complains, because they are a great conversation starter. She says she only ever hears people ask me questions and give me compliments on them. Which is true. Until today.

While I understand that tattoos aren't for everyone, and not everyone enjoys them, I don't feel I should have to make exceptions, changes, or excuses to those people. The world is becoming more acceptable of tattoos, but they still aren't quite where tattoo lovers alike hope for them to be. Granted, most tattooed people don't care whether people like them or not, myself included. Even the once in a blue moon when I meet someone who does not approve, I still don't care.

Today was a bit different. I don't think it was so much what the woman said but how she said it. I work in customer service. I might add this is not my long term choice of work. I am a Graphic Designer in training, and I think pretty much any artist can get away with tattoos. Graphic Designers especially. I do understand that tattoos aren't accepted in every work environment, but I also am aware of doctors, lawyers, police officers and any other "professional" line that are covered in tattoos. So today I was at work. I was helping this older woman, by older I mean at least 70s or 80s. Right off the bat she seemed like one of these miserable seniors that think society and the world has done them wrong. It really didn't matter that I'm tattooed, she was probably going to be a bitch anyway. We charge for plastic bags at my work place, which was the first thing she wanted to complain about "I don't understand at all why I should have to pay for a bag." Without going into this argument too far, I'll just point out her choice of words "why *I* should have to pay", as if she's the only person that ever gets charged. I mentioned to her that since we've started charging, we've seen a significant decrease in consumption of plastic - "ya but it doesn't seem right that the government charges, it's just a bag, they make so much money off of me already"... OK lady, here's your book (now get out!)

But before she walks away she does a double take at my arm "ohhhh.... I was wondering what was wrong with your arm and then I saw that!" Might I add again, that I had already been talking to this woman for at least a couple of minutes before this came out of her mouth. Now, either she is so self absorbed that she really didn't notice, OR she did and decided to continue with her bitchiness and point it out. Regardless of which, I just smiled, as I usually do. She then follows with "Oh it's just not nice, here we all are trying to take care of our skin and then you people go and do things like that, it's just awful!" You people?! I can finally understand how people feel when that's directed racially. Wow. She kept going though "it's just... it.... I just don't understand it!" I only replied with "well that doesn't make it wrong." I usually respond to people of these sorts with "I didn't have your opinion in mind when I got it done" or "well I like it", and generally I don't bother to get upset over people like this, I'm not even really upset, just annoyed. It may surprise you to hear, the people I get negative comments from the most are women in their 40s-50s. Anyone under 40 I usually find accepting, even older seniors I don't hear many negative comments. It's funny how many little old ladies want to look and touch and ask so many questions, they're just curious and I'm OK with that. Even older men, I don't know if it's because of war times, but they seem to be interested. Men of all ages actually, I find are pretty accepting. It seems to be the stuck up snooty women in their middle ages that are "disgusted". This woman seemed to be in a league of her own. I've never, in the years I've had tattoos, met someone that was SO put off by my life choices. I suppose I should feel bad for her, for being that close minded, and upset with the world for not following her rules.

What I'm getting at, is I really don't understand how one can be so negative and upset with the world around them. I'm surprised people live as long as they do being so unhappy and pissed off about everything. I certainly would not be the person I am, especially tattooed, having kept my mind that closed. I don't make my life decisions based on what others might think of me, and I certainly don't let those opinions stop me from making future decisions. I don't need to justify to anyone that I enjoy my life, but I do. I'm happy with every decision I've made and the way I live my life. To anyone who is tattooed, keep doing what you're doing and love every moment of it. To anyone who isn't, accept that people who are tattooed, are so because they love it, it's something they enjoy and they don't care for your opinion on the matter. To everyone, be humble, don't walk around with your head in the clouds and expect everything to go your way, if you feel the need to belittle others and be rude for no reason: keep your mouth shut.

Welcome!

Welcome to my blog!

I've decided that I have a lot of interests, and a lot of things to say. I'm not good at keeping a journal or "diary", but I really like having a collection of thoughts. Facebook is fine I suppose, although I find it's hard to really post much, you have to be so careful. Whether it be the Grammar Nazi's, or the incredibly opinionated friends, the "rules of facebook" are getting tighter and tighter. It almost seems like any time you post anything, you have people breathing down your neck about your spelling, fact checking, telling you your thoughts are wrong or any other annoying thing you can come up with. Either that or they completely ignore your posts all together. So people may ignore these blog posts, but at least I'm not shoving it in my friends faces on facebook. You have a choice to come here and read about what's on my mind. I didn't bombard you with it, so don't get upset.

That being said, I would really hope there's nothing for you to get upset about. I may share funny articles, pictures ect. I started this in hopes of being able to "review" things that interest me, more for my own memory and sanity then anything else. You see, I have a love/hate relationship with my memory. I am extremely good at remembering faces, names, dates, random unnecessary facts... but I have a huge problem with remembering if I said something I meant to say to someone else or not. I will think of something I need to tell my boyfriend, or a friend, time will pass and 5, 10 even 20 minutes later I will either tell them again, or ask them if I already did. Sean, the boyfriend, always gets mad at me because I will tell him something, and then tell him again 10 minutes later. So although I have a great memory with SOME things, I have a terrible memory with other things. This will be the place I come to talk about random things. When I look back on it, I will remember, oh ya, I really liked that coffee, I should buy some more. I did like that book, but what was it about again? I also have a terrible memory with stories. If something is REALLY great in my mind, I will remember all of the important details and most of the small ones. If I did enjoy the story but it wasn't the best thing ever, I will remember the most important plot points and nothing else. This is especially bad with movies and books. Which is terrible because I work in a book store. My job requires me to sell books to customers. In order to do that, I not only have to read the books, but I have to be able to recount the basics to a customer, when they ask, and they always do. I can't just tell people, "I really liked it, but I don't really remember what happens", which is actually what I do a lot of the time. The same thing happens when I tell friends to watch a movie, "I don't really remember what happens, but I really liked it, I remember that much, it had something to do with a bank robbery... just watch it!" So hopefully this blog will help me remember some of these things, provided I actually blog them first. Here's hoping!

So I'd like to put a category on what type of blog this will be, but at this point I doubt I'll be able to do that. Sometimes I might talk about great books, or movies, sometimes I might upload pictures of my nails, and I know no one cares, but I do. Sometimes I may post adorable pictures of kittens and puppies and sometimes I may get serious and political. I'll say right now that I will always welcome different opinions and views, but I will not tolerate being told I'm wrong. I usually don't like to get too opinionated in the open and share political views, but I also believe some things can't be kept inside, we need to share ideas and views with one another. If not to better understand every side, but also to remain respectful. If you get too caught up in your own opinions sometimes, and keep telling yourself you're right, or justified, it becomes very easy to lose respect for the other side, and that also, should not be tolerated.

So hey, let's see where this goes, if I'm the only person that ever reads this, that is fine with me, at least I'll have a chronological archive of my own thoughts to remain on the internet forever!

M*